It almost sounds like to me that the woman would be the sort to hide the realities of life from their children for as long as possible.
Being a parent myself means there is a lot of things that I don’t tell my kids about right away. I let them be kids as I never had a chance to do that when I was a child. I grew up early, hard and was very wise to the ways of the world having seen too many things too soon.
That being said, when my children have been progressing though each year I base what I tell them or talk to them about on their mental capacity to handle information. I let them enjoy Santa and the Easter Bunny for now, there is going to be plenty of time for that bubble to burst later.
I also listen to my kids to see what their friends are talking about.
As far as beer? Beer has always been about my children. Drinking at least. Firearms are too, (No they are not really mixed. Settle down.)
I have taken my kids shooting. They know there are firearms around the house. They can ask to see them anytime they want and I let them.
I have let my kids sip some hard cider from time to time to try it. They remain uninterested. They have also helped me when I have brewed, helped me do anything I ask.
With this instance the OP brought up I would think its odd of her parenting but…
Sometimes we don’t want to have to explain to everyone why our two year old is shouting beer beer beer!
This OP reminds me of the wife of a friend who recently put a post on facebook asking all her friends to not use ‘poopoo words’ or some stupid phrase because her 12 year old might see it on her (the mother’s) facebook. My advice was keep your kid off facebook. You have the right to raise your kids as you see fit but you don’t have the right to ask the world to modify their behavior for your parenting style. You certainly don’t have the right to tell me what words I may use on my facebook or more importantly in MY HOME.
My kids, now 19, 21 and 28 were raised in a pretty open way. We discussed pretty much anything and everything with them in an honest way. We let them be children, Santa, easter bunny etc but were honest when they got to the age to question childhood illusion. We never hid alcohol from them and my oldest referred to it as ‘beerd’ at a very young age. He never liked it as a youngster but grew very fond of it in the late teen years. My middle one loved the taste of beer from an early age and is a pretty responsible drinker. The baby still wrinkles up her nose at the slightest taste of wine or beer but seems to have developed a taste for ‘fuzzy navel’ type drinks. Still she’s shown very good judgement with regared to alcohol in her first semester of college.
My wife doesn’t drink at all so I always have had a DD and use her as one even if I only have 1-2 drinks out for dinner. So the kids knew early that drinking and driving is totally unacceptable. The woman in the OP is living in a dream world where she can cloister her child from all she deems unacceptable. Good luck with that! And good luck reigning that kid in when he/she goes off to college and busts loose with no base for good decision making. I hope it doesn’t end badly.
Did you realize you were starting a post of everybody ripping on your friend? I think you should send her a link.[/quote]
Ya I know right…it’s funny, I’ve been pretty good friends with the guy since high school, but neither I nor my wife have really cared too much for his wife ever since we met her(probably 10 years now)…so I showed my wife some of the posts this weekend and she got a kick out of them. I think both my buddy and his wife are pretty decent people and parents overall(even though I don’t agree with this particular tactic at all), his wife can be a bit abrasive but I don’t think she means any harm most of the time(a fact that is usually lost on my wife!), so I didn’t take any offense to the original comment, just thought it was really strange and got me thinking. That said I appreciate all the comments thus far and agree with most everything that’s been said, it’s certainly helped reinforce my own thoughts on the matter.
Today my 2.5 year old accompanied my wife and I to my 4 month old’s well visit. When the doc asked the 2.5 year old, “What’s in your daddy’s cup? What does he drink in the morning?” my son’s response was “Beer!”
We all laughed hysterically and then informed him it was coffee. I did feel compelled to inform the doc that I brew, and that my boy is very interested in the process .
While I find it very odd to shelter kids from the word “beer” (or any other words, for that matter, including “curse” words), I recognize that for others the scenario above would be very alarming…
Ya I know right…it’s funny, I’ve been pretty good friends with the guy since high school, but neither I nor my wife have really cared too much for his wife ever since we met her(probably 10 years now)…so I showed my wife some of the posts this weekend and she got a kick out of them. I think both my buddy and his wife are pretty decent people and parents overall(even though I don’t agree with this particular tactic at all), his wife can be a bit abrasive but I don’t think she means any harm most of the time(a fact that is usually lost on my wife!), so I didn’t take any offense to the original comment, just thought it was really strange and got me thinking. That said I appreciate all the comments thus far and agree with most everything that’s been said, it’s certainly helped reinforce my own thoughts on the matter.[/quote]
I have friends with views that are WAY on the other side of mine. It really doesn’t matter, as long as they are good people.
My oldest is almost 3 and knows what beer is. She spent 30 minutes last Thursday labeling and decorating my freshly bottled IPA. It is a good way to remind me at the end of the day that no matter how much she drives me nuts, she does love me.
We were at the library for story/play time a few weeks back and the little putz went around the room giving pretend glasses of beer to all of the adults.
Do I give the twerp a shot glass of beer at dinner on a rare occasion?No comment.
Heh. I’ve let my oldest taste it. He said, “Mmmmmmmm…I like it!” Of course, he says that about a lot of stuff that we like that he’s never had, and then he ultimately wants nothing to do with it .
Anyway, he’s only had that one taste, but one time soon after that we were out to dinner and he started yelling, “I want beer dada! Can I have beer?” Of course, I couldn’t help myself and said loudly, “you can only have beer at home, bud.” My wife was reluctantly amused by that .
After 32 years of marriage I’m used to being ignored so here is my advice.
1, Parenting doesn’t come with a handbook and it is the hardest most frustrating thing I have ever done. Just do your best.
2, Censorship is the easiest way to create curiosity.
3, No matter how hard you try your kids will challenge you, which is kind of neat when they turn into really neat adults that have a questioning mind.
4, When your kids screw up, and they will, blame their friends because it’s always the other parents that raise the rotten kids.( Then you find out it was your 16 year old that jimmied the lock on the bar and supplied the alcohol for the party. A 6 hour trip home from Ohio to see our older Son gave us alot of time to think of a proper punishment)
5, When they screw up make them take responsibilty. Out of 20-to 30 kids at the party our Son and his buddy were the only two to self report to the AD the following Monday. He missed a 1/2 of the track season and had to talk to his coaches in person. We got so much flack from the other parents, because they were more concerned about ratting on the other kids. In our HS it is not part of the process to turn other people in, but my son was subject to unscheduled drug tests the rest of his his school career.
The above child is in his senior year of college in mech. engineering, on the deans list, takes a growler back when he goes to his apartment, and uses a taxi when he drinks.
just remeber “It may take a village to raise a kid, but don’t forget that every village has an idiot.”
I like the subtle interjection of this word, Ken
Since my child was old enough to speak, Daddy and Beer went hand in hand (I guess that’s two hands of beer). I was worried at times that other parents, teachers, adults would get the wrong impression when she mentioned that my favorite drink was beer. Eventually it didn’t matter to me what others thought. I felt like my daughter would grow up to know and understand alcohol in a way that I never did. I lived a sheltered childhood and all of my alcoholic experiences were plagued by excess and stupidity. I feel the sheltering had something to do with it, along with the hereditary nature of addiction.
I would like to share a short story. After recently getting my sister and brother-in-law into homebrewing we were visiting one another sharing our latest brews. I left my innkeeper (extract) on the edge of the counter. My 5-year-old nephew was thirsty and spotted some apple juice and picked up my glass. After gaining a mouthful he realized it was not apple juice and spit it all back into my glass. He tells this story to other adults and is somewhat proud to admit “I’ve tasted beer!”
One more story about my kiddo and beer. We stopped a brewery 5 minutes from our house for a growler fill and some yeast. She saw that I was taking in my bottle, so she grabbed her sippy… do as daddy does, right?
Welp, it gets better! After my growler was filled, my little imp looked at the guy at the counter, offered her sippy and politely asked, “Please may I have beer?” Some people laughed at the situation,but the guy at the counter was all befuddled and did not know what to say. I told her that only adults can have their bottles filled with beer and we have enough to share.
[quote=“CTDan”]One more story about my kiddo and beer. We stopped a brewery 5 minutes from our house for a growler fill and some yeast. She saw that I was taking in my bottle, so she grabbed her sippy… do as daddy does, right?
Welp, it gets better! After my growler was filled, my little imp looked at the guy at the counter, offered her sippy and politely asked, “Please may I have beer?” Some people laughed at the situation,but the guy at the counter was all befuddled and did not know what to say. I told her that only adults can have their bottles filled with beer and we have enough to share.
But to be nice, they gave her a lollipop.
Dan :lol: [/quote]
Thats a good story right there. I like other people’s kids. All the fun stories. None of the responsibility :cheers:
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