Help me name this Stout?!?!?!

Greetings Everyone!

I am relatively new to brewing and have recently begun experimenting with some custom brews. I started with mild variations on recipe kits and gradually moved out to the simply bizarre. A long time brewer friend of mine just sent me this recipe he put together for what looks like some sort of forgotten love child between a Black IPA and a Traditional English Porter. He also adds some other flavors that sound tasty but I worry they might be overpowering in what is already an extremely complex beer. This is a malt extract brew.

Can anyone with dark beer experience please give me some direction regarding the below recipe?

I’m trying to figure out what I should expect in terms of Original/Final Gravity, alcohol content, aging requirements, etc. I’m thinking 3 weeks Primary and 3 weeks Secondary, 2 weeks in bottles at room temp, 1 additional week in the fridge.

I also need to make up a name for this scary brew.

Thanks in advance for your help! I love this website!

Specialty Grains:
0.25 lbs English Extra Dark Crystal
0.25 lbs Belgian Debittered Black
0.25 lbs Briess Caramel 80L
0.25 lbs Briess Caramel 40L
0.5 lbs Fawcett Pale Chocolate
0.25 lbs Crushed Roasted Almonds

Fermentables:
0.4 lbs Munton’s Dark DME
0.4 lbs Briess Golden Light DME
3.15 lbs Munich Malt Syrup
0.25 lbs Honey
1 lb Lactose (Mix with Crushed Vanilla Bean 2 or 3 days before when you make your Yeast Starter)
4 Tablespoons Maltodextrine (Only 5% Fermentable)
1 Crushed Vanilla Bean
3.15 lbs Amber Malt Syrup (Late Addition 20 Minutes)

Hops:
0.5 oz Williamette 4.0-6.0% Pellets (60 Minutes)
0.5 oz Mt. Hood 4.0-7.0% Pellets (60 Minutes)
0.5 oz Cascade 4.5-7.0% Leaf (40 Minutes)
0.5 oz East Kent Goldings 4.0-5.5% Pellets (40 Minutes)
0.5 oz Cluster 5.5-8.0% Leaf (20 Minutes)
0.5 oz German Perle 6.5-9.0% Pellets (15 Minutes)
0.5 oz Centenial 9.0-12.0% Leaf (15 Minutes)

Flavorings (Add to Secondary Fermentation):
2 Tablespoons Coarse Ground Coffee
2 Cups Halved Roasted Almonds
1 Crushed Vanilla Bean
1 Teaspoon Almond Extract
1 Teaspoon Vanilla Extract

Yeast:
1 WYEAST 1945 NB NEOBRITANNIA Smack Pack (Make a starter 2 or 3 days before with nutrients. Mix starter with 1 liter of cooled wort for 10-15 minutes before incorporating into the carboy)

That recipe scares the crap out of me. Not to be a jerk but personally, I wouldn’t brew it. It’s hard to know where to start any comments b/c that beer gives new meaning to “kitchen sink”. There are too many ingredients. I wouldn’t combine late hops with specialty beer type ingredients. I also wouldn’t use Dark or Amber LME for anything. Most people recommend using Light LME and adding specialty grains as needed. Oh, and the lb of lactose in there is just ridiculous in a beer with this much crap it already!

forget the naysayers & brew it up! I’d personally drop the almond & vanilla extracts. split & scrape the bean into some vodka or directly into secondary (or bulk age if it’s not re-fermenting).

name vote: Blackerack Stout. no reason, just sounds good.

I admit this scares me too, that’s why I put this post on here. I think i’m going to cut the amount of lactose in half to .5 pounds. The only reason I’m even leaving it in is because I believe it belongs in any dark beer that you want to give that creamy texture to. The amber malt extract late addition, personally, I think does nothing but muddy the flavor. I’ll probably just stick with 6 lbs of munich malt syrup (no late addition) and leave it at that. I’m going to take Edward’s advice and forgo the extract. I think these specialty grains sound good, but will probably pale in the background. The only thing remaining in this brew that still has me befuddled is the hops. What kind of an effect would I get if I followed those times exactly? Most of the hops are not very high in alpha oils so I’m imagining something VERY aromatic without too much astringency. I have most of these ingredients on hand and all I’m risking is an occupied carboy and 2 cases worth of bottle caps so I think I’m going to brew it up and see what happens.

Jlap, you might have thought you were being a jerk but I actually really appreciate the feedback. To top things off, I think you may have named this Stout. Even though it looks more like a porter. lol.

Blackerack Stout sounds cool, but I think the only appropriate name at this point is Kitchen Sink Stout.

Thanks again guys.

Any idea what kind of gravity I’m looking at? How long do I need to let this junk sit in the bottle before I get the guts to taste it?

I should rephrase what I wrote by saying that I think there are too many ingredients that are going to be fighting each other. I see at least 3 beers in there. My suggestion if you want to make a wacky beer is to think about what each ingredient is going to contribute and come up with a combination that sounds good, not a bunch of individual ingredients that sound good by themselves. 7 hop varieties, vanilla, coffee, almonds, lactose, and maltodextrine does not sound like a classic combo to me! Typically late hops are not a good idea in beers with fruit or spices etc. because they fight each other. Lactose is going to add a lot of sweetness in addition to the mouthfeel. If I wanted mouthfeel in a beer like this I’d probably go with flaked barley or oats.

Jlap, thanks for all your suggestions. I made some major modifications to the recipe and brewed the below recipe (5 Gal.) last night. About 14 hours since I pitched my yeast and the top of my 6 gallon carboy is filled with krausen. I attached a blow off hose just in case. I tasted the wort when I took my hydrometer reading and it was exactly what I was going for.

Let me know any additional thoughts you might have and I will keep this thread up to date through bottling day.

Specialty Grains (20 min steep):

0.2 lbs English Extra Dark Crystal
0.2 lbs Belgian Debittered Black
0.2 lbs Briess Caramel 80L
0.2 lbs Briess Caramel 40L
0.4 lbs Fawcett Pale Chocolate
16 Oz Sliced Roasted Almonds (I added this to the hop bag so they stayed in for the entire boil)

Fermentables (70 min boil):

0.5 cups Munton’s Dark DME (This was all I had to make my starter wort 2 days ago)
1 lbs Briess Golden Light DME
6.3 lbs Munich Malt Syrup (Only had the small bottles)
0.7 lbs Honey
7 Teaspoons Maltodextrine (5% Fermentable)

Hops (3.5 oz):

Bittering:
1 oz Cluster 5.5-8.0% Leaf (70 Minutes)
0.25 oz Cascade 4.5-7.0% Leaf (70 Minutes)

Flavor:
0.8 oz Mt. Hood 4.0-7.0% Pellets (40 Minutes)
0.2 oz German Perle 6.5-9.0% Pellets (40 Minutes)
0.25 oz Cascade 4.5-7.0% Leaf (40 Minutes)

Aroma:
0.8 oz German Perle 6.5-9.0% Pellets (20 Minutes)
0.2 oz Mt. Hood 4.0-7.0% Pellets (20 Minutes)

Flavorings (Add to Secondary Fermentation):
16 Oz Sliced Roasted Almonds

Yeast:
WYEAST 1945 NB NEOBRITANNIA (1 pint starter 48 hours before boil)

Starting Gravity:
1.072

I say brew it. I use the same approach when I formulate porters and I love the complexity.