Hey WR -
I’m just a perpetual batch-elor (pun intended), but I do have some advice if you want to hear it. I’ve been doing AG for 7 or 8 years, and I find that it really takes a lot of focus to nail everything at every step, and as I got more comfortable with the AG brewing process I have gotten better at multi-tasking in every possible way to shorten the brew day. Not including recipe development, it takes me edit: about 7 hours normally, from setup through cleanup and putting stuff back in its spot. Meaning, I have my sparge water heated by the time my mash runoff is done, I have my immersion chiller and hoses set up before I need them, I empty, clean, and put away my mash/lauter tun during the boil, I put things away after I’m done needing them so it isn’t a major chore at the day’s end to collect everything (I brew outside), buckets and other needed items are sanitized by the time the wort is chilled, etc., etc.
I’m thinking that as a dad and husband, to keep from slipping on your responsibilities when the family life demands it, after a bit of a learning curve, carve out what you’ve whittled down to the required timeframe, when SWMBO and the kids are involved elsewhere, or being cared for by someone other than you so you can focus on your brewday. Also, brew at least 10 gallon batches since they take approximately the same time as a 5-gallon batch, cutting down on your needed brewdays. Also consider kegging if you want, since it cuts way down on the time bottling takes.
Mt 2 cents. Best wishes for a happy family AG adventure!
Steve